Finally, someone takes my rather “disruptive” thoughts and puts in some really polished writing.
I have always had my aversion to several “widely accepted” norms and standards, simply because one day, I suddenly realized that these things were once personal opinions, and reflections of just one person’s private sentiments. And these grew into suggestions that suddenly spread all over the globe, and boom, it’s become societal standard, a norm, worse still, a law even. Crazy scary, if you ask me.
Amazing piece, Victory. Hit several black and white notes of relativity, I must confess. Q
People most especially Nigerians have not yet gotten the understanding that not everyone is going to be stinky rich or rich in general. No matter how hard a person tries, it jus might not be his destiny. Why not settle on being comfortable and contented. A really beautiful piece, I wish a lot more people could read it.
The first paragraph ? the second, the third, I definitely needed to read this, cos I’ve been inside for too long because I’m trying to avoid accidents ❤️
We use cruise to mask up important things… I have people say it’s the best survival skill one can have in this country. But we are then oblivious to the fact that our subconscious self is taking in some really harmful contents.
Very poignant line, access is different from connections. Social media is creating this bias where we think we can be friends with a lot of people just because we happen to have online times that overlap, there is no bigger lie than this. Friendship is much deeper.
“You cannot be friends with everyone you know.” Very correct. Social media can give us access to so many people, but it doesn’t guarantee deep connections.
This was so worth reading. I liked the fact that you spelt out the realities on the topic and also picked out what to focus on, and not holding too tightly and having rigid expectations.
We all make changes at one point in our lives and I think it affects the friends we have, some friendships make it past the changes, some don’t. That doesn’t make any less valuable.
I’ve lost friends. People I thought would be there for a long time, or at least till now, but then, life happens. Only validating this article….not all friendships or relationships in general are meant to last forever.
Sam Smith once said “…. real love is never a waste of time” . I comfort myself with these words every time a friendship ends. Although I may miss them, but the times we were happy together were never a waste, and so
I love this so much, Victory. I’ve been trying to put together this dark love poem for a while but never got the strength. This sort of inspired me to finish it?. This is a truly lovely poem❤️❤️
Hmmm this was a good read, but here’s my take on Validation. I believe one of the major needs of every human being is the need for “Acceptance” (in your case you called it validation). I agree with the ideology that days humans needs some kind of validation it helps the man stay alive. But I didn’t find the perfect balance for this article. Firstly it’s because I believe Acceptance is a psychological need, while validation in my understanding is not essential. I think if you replaced Acceptance with validation, we’d be on the same page. For instance Feedback from people on this article is not a matter of “Acceptance”, if we don’t like this it won’t affect your social life but perhaps affect productivity positively or negatively. Nevertheless, it was well written and I understand your communications.
Thank you Dami, your insight is well appreciated. I do see the line you draw between acceptance as a psychological need and inessential validation.
My employment of the term “validation” instead of “acceptance” is because it’s the more familiar term in this context and my usage of it actually intentionally quite loose.
However, you did also point out that the presence or absence of validation in the way you’ve highlighted it does have some sort of impact. While it may not be an established psychological need, its effects on productivity, as you pointed out, still matter.
I’m grateful for your input, it got my brain churning ??
Very insightful read I must say. In as much as validation is not necessarily a bad thing, I think we should strive to not make it the basis to scale all our actions.
Why does everyone assume people who are looking for soul mates are looking for some perfect person? What if it’s not about the perfect factor? What if it’s something else?
You meet like 50 guys, and somehow, they all end up boring you, and, now, you’re looking for…..more. From personal experience, sometimes, all they’re looking for is…..more.
Not everyone is naive as to be waiting, or looking, for a perfect person anymore. Sometimes, we just want more, dammit.
Hi! There’s no need to apologise for your perspective. It’s valid and I welcome it, so thank you ?
The concept of a soul mate does imply either a perfect person, or a perfect bond. Something ethereal that doesn’t require work. At least, that’s how I perceive it.
My perspective isn’t meant to invalidate yours, but I also didn’t mean to imply settling with just “anyone”. That it’s possible doesn’t necessarily mean that you should, it just requires new perspective.
I suppose I should’ve stated it but I assumed it went without saying and that’s my bad ?. I did highlight the importance of finding someone whose values align with yours.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting more, I’m just pointing out the reality that “more” may look different from what you imagine.
For the first paragraph I imagine a goth who wears too much eye makeup. He’s sniffling softly because of his allergies.
He can’t even look her in the eyes as he hands her a withered rose…..
And for some reason I put The Weekend’s Out of Time as the song for it?
I love how delicate this feels yet there’s so much emotion.
Once again thank you Doctor Wrights ?
Hi Victory. I quickly came to check this out because The Perks of Being a Wallflower is one of the books I started out with when I newly fell in love with literature. It is a warm book. And as you said, a sad kind of warm but warm none the less. And warmth is what our hearts need. I remember crying at my thoughts of what might happen to one of the characters. Lol. I just want to say I’m grateful for books and how they open us to ourselves.
Somehow I think your writing has made me find my safe space. It’s like every single thing I ever felt and thought, is finally coming out and I can tell myself I’m just a human person too and all these things, they’re real, and I’m not weak to feel them and be exactly who I am.
As always
Thank you Doctor Wrights ?
I’m glad you read my writings and feel this way about them. I feel this way about the writers I read often and I can definitely relate, so thank you too ?
Good one victory ✌️.
For whoever is struggling with Time Management. You can get ‘No Excuses’ by Brian Tracy or ‘Eat That frog now!’ By the same author.
Time is one of your greatest treasures don’t let Instagram and tiktok steal it.
This is very ture and cancel culture can be cancelled but it would still be the same thing repeating itself. Cancel culture would be cancelling their own culture and still shutting people up for having an opinion.
Victory, you write so eloquently that every line creates a picture and as I read through they are set in motion, one which didn’t stop even at the end of the last line.
Ah I was wondering why I haven’t seen your post in a while. Funny how I deeply get you. Just yesterday my girlfriend was asking why I have become so edgy and less caring and it stuck me that it’s because everything I have come to love I have sold out to make money from and now I no longer love anything. Everything is just work and all that shit. Lol. I have too much on my desk and too little in my account. It’s supposed to be a sacrifice yeah? This youth i mean. We are supposed to sacrifice our youth for a better tomorrow or so. But Omoo.
Hey vee, I’m smiling while writing this comment. We have a lot ahead of us. It’s easy to be overwhelmed by the magnitude of responsibilities ahead but if we only focus only on those we make our existence centered just on bleak necessities. We would not be fair to ourselves that way. So let us take out time to listen to the echoes of the mountains, express every emotion as they come, watch the sky turn blue to grey to yellow and everything beautiful. Life is beautiful. Take your time and live it. Happy Birthday to you ???
“If we only focus on the magnitude of the responsibilities ahead, we make our existence centred just on bleak necessities and we would not be fair to ourselves that way”
Such true words that I’m going to try to remind myself of often. Life is truly beautiful. Thank you ?
Comment*
I have battled with birthday depression for a long time now and I thought it was just something only I felt. Days to my birthdays I am filled with trepidation and gloom and I can’t seem to come out from the depression.
I turned a new year this July and it was worse than ever. It provoked me to write something about it. I just wish I could be as happy as everyone else and simply enjoy the beauty of my birthdays
Hey Nora, I’m sorry you’ve had to struggle with this. I have too and it’s honestly no delight. You deserve an amazing birthday celebration and I hope you’re able to find the strength to enjoy the next one.
There’s a lot to be thankful for. I hope you’re able to see this truly ?
Happy birthday in advance Victory.
This post is very relatable and i always try to make those who experience same feel better , but i hardly do for myself. Thanks for this beautiful post. I hope you feel happier and happier for this and many more birthdays.
This is a very lovely post? I have the birthday depression almost every year too, my birthdays have just always been a reminder of the things I haven’t done, you know? The recent one though, in May, when I turned 22, i wouldn’t say it wasn’t depressing, cause it kind of was; all my friends weren’t around, and I spent it alone, but the step-up that I think it had over other birthdays, was the fact that I didn’t dwell in the depression. I made sure to keep pushing it to the back of my mind, not giving it any light of day, to fester. But, in that sense, and reading this post now, I see that it is not exactly a full progress, because I didn’t deal with it, that is, I didn’t think about the good things, I just pushed the bad things to the back of my mind. Which, if I’m being really honest, is really not all that better either. But what your blog post have done for me, is, one, helps me see that i am not alone in this (the comments :)), and, two, I am going to try to be better about my birthday next year.
(I’m really sorry I’ve turned your comment section to a mini blog post, lol?, this topic just really speaks to me, and a lot of others, apparently)
I’m glad I shared this. Honestly, comments like yours make me feel like I’m not alone too. I like to remind myself that it’s a work in progress. Maybe your last birthday wasn’t awesome, but the next one could be and it’s up to you.
I don’t mind you turning the comments section into a mini blog post, I’m just happy to hear your thoughts?
Thank you for reading, and thank you for the birthday wish ?
Beautiful. I feel it every time, good to know I’m not alone haha. I occasionally get me gifts and go somewhere different to help me feel better but I almost always work all day on my birthdays to keep me distracted (as usual).
Thanks for sharing as mine is few months away and I can’t predict how I’d feel by then. I’ll keep my fingers crossed this time?
I actually smiled when you said your birthday gift would be not giving in to birthday depression.
I love how raw this is. I thought I was the only one that feels this way. My birthday is also this month and I’ve been masking the birthday depression with superficial happiness.
I’d try not to give in to birthday depression this year?
Thanks for sharing this.
This year’s birthday was the only one I was genuinely excited about before it even came for the past 3 years.
I thought I was the only one who experienced this. I find solace in knowing I’m not alone.
I think what happened differently this year was that I finally came to terms with the fact that growth is not as terrible as I thought it was. A new season should be exciting and the fact that I get a shot at another year to stretch onto greater things? Amazing..
I know I’ll probably be cancelled for this ? but what the h*** is all the fuss about dodo? I’m sorry (not sorry), but I just don’t see it.
Barring that, this is a really great post, and as always, you touch on the really important stuff with grace and open-mindedness, which is what we all need from random blog posts like these❤
So, yeah, talking stages don’t necessarily ‘fail’, the person’s just not my (your) person ?
(Lemme comman run away before the dodo lovers that are already gathering in the comment section come and attack me?)
I love how your writing are so easy to read. I tell myself I’m too busy to read all these words at the moment but then I read the first line and boom! I am at the last paragraph. The wright magic ✨??
My favorite line has too be “imagine if they don’t like fried plantain” ? ? ?
But I feel the reason for the context of “failed talking stage” is because we put in too much pressure and expectation into a rush of emotion and then beat ourselves up for not meeting that satisfaction in the long run.
Anyways though, na una get power to find who to do talking stage with, I just want to make money, graduate and japa to continue my life goals
Came across this post and decided to read through…. You’re a brilliant writer.
I resonate with the idea of there not being failed talking stages, it wasn’t just meant to work out.
But why will someone not like fried plantain? Like, what then do they like?
Thank you, please check them out.
?? Reducing emotional stress will definitely be good. I also think talking stages would be easier if we were all more honest.
People that don’t like dodo obviously don’t know good things.
Ah yes this is the post! You see I have always wanted to write something about this. I had always wanted to define what being a man meant. What being masculine meant and it was until recently I was able to come up with a definition thanks to a book I read by Jordan B Peterson. And I have come to see how it can be easy for society is pin the hide your emotion tag on men and why the tag might have stayed for so long. This was delightful to read Victory! This for writing something this thoughtful!
Of course, the emotions we are talking about here are the negative ones that. e.g
anxiety, sadness, depression etc. Like you said, whether or not men show them, they are nonetheless present.
But what I think is the major problem with “Men cry too”, is the consequence of taking the advice. The systemic response men get after showing vulnerabilities are mostly not encouraging sadly; ranging from nonchalance to outright ridicule. Notably, this comes not only from men but also women, and which is sad, because they are those from whom men hope to get a better response, at least being those whom the society has mostly greeted their expressed emotions with empathy since forever .
Mr Wrights, I look forward to a sequel to this article where you explore what men would want as a response to them expressing their vulnerabilities and the current state of our society on this.
Your comment is very insightful, thank you for sharing. I think it’s a valid point you’ve raised about the reaction to these emotions not being quite as empathetic as it should be. Sadly, I think that’s owing to the fact that we still have a long way to go with regards to humanising and accepting men’s emotions. I hope it gets better ?
Another enlightening read as usual❤
And so very important, oh so very important. The ‘damage’ parts of our culture- its teachings- have done to our society, will only be repaired with time, lots of it, and conscious and deliberate relearning, I’m afraid.
Like this here, it would take deliberate conviction on the part of each individual, to act rightly in response to the Men Cry Too movement, and the practical daily life examples. For women; to not scoff, or sneer at any general show of emotional action by men. And men; to not automatically feel all these things you listed up there- fear, unfamiliarity, and so on.
I can’t even pretend to understand the true depths of this issue, I can only imagine, but I try to respond to it with empathy (the empathy we are acclaimed to have in abundance).
I read this poem every once in a while, I’m still not sure why. Some days I think it’s because of the title (this is my leading hypothesis), but I also find the second paragraph or stanza compelling. Maybe it’s both, who knows?
that bit about forgiving the present self who is somehow unable to let go of the past is so relatable. I at times find myself still mad at myself over mistakes made years before but then I’m learning to let go and just forgive myself in baby steps
the part where you said time is only a construct struck a chord in me. i also didn’t feel that my year ended on a final note, but here’s to more favorable conditions for the new year for us all!
Oge
January 1, 2022 at 1:23 pm
Great piece.
Victory Okoyomoh
January 5, 2022 at 8:20 am
Thank you.
Ayomide
January 1, 2022 at 6:58 pm
awesome! I found this refreshing to read.
Victory Okoyomoh
January 5, 2022 at 8:20 am
I’m happy you did.
Cirphrank
January 1, 2022 at 8:08 pm
Victory forget all these yarns, wire me small make I take hold my side this January.
Olayemi Takuro
January 1, 2022 at 9:07 pm
Love love ettt! No truer words!
Victory Okoyomoh
January 5, 2022 at 8:19 am
Thank youuu. I’m glad you loved it.
Evelyn
January 2, 2022 at 12:14 pm
This is so good. Thanks for sharing✨
Victory Okoyomoh
January 5, 2022 at 8:19 am
Thank you for reading
Obehi
January 2, 2022 at 11:09 pm
Glad I came across this
Victory Okoyomoh
January 5, 2022 at 8:18 am
Thank you. I’m glad you did too.
Proph Kay
January 3, 2022 at 12:45 pm
Finally, someone takes my rather “disruptive” thoughts and puts in some really polished writing.
I have always had my aversion to several “widely accepted” norms and standards, simply because one day, I suddenly realized that these things were once personal opinions, and reflections of just one person’s private sentiments. And these grew into suggestions that suddenly spread all over the globe, and boom, it’s become societal standard, a norm, worse still, a law even. Crazy scary, if you ask me.
Amazing piece, Victory. Hit several black and white notes of relativity, I must confess. Q
Victory Okoyomoh
January 5, 2022 at 8:17 am
Your comment makes me feel less alone in my thought process. Thank you for reading!
Emmanuella James
January 4, 2022 at 7:34 am
This was such an enjoyable read. The writing is stellar and I could relate to every paragraph. Great work
Victory Okoyomoh
January 5, 2022 at 8:16 am
I’m glad you enjoyed it Emmanuella, thank you.
Livinpraiz
February 12, 2022 at 6:47 pm
Wonderful insight victory wrights
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:44 pm
Thank you ?
Omon
February 12, 2022 at 7:13 pm
Life can be so much more, really. But sometimes only a sated stomach can recognize that it is.
It was a good read.
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:44 pm
True. It’s hard to focus on anything else when the stomach isn’t fed.
Chinelo
February 12, 2022 at 7:25 pm
??
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:43 pm
??
Pearl
February 12, 2022 at 7:26 pm
Nice
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:42 pm
Thank you
Isioma Okobu
February 12, 2022 at 7:27 pm
“We want to be rich enough to buy the moon and then we`ll be happy and so, we just let our lives pass” so sad ?? I’m grateful for this piece
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:42 pm
I’m glad you read it. I hope we all find contentment.
Happy
February 12, 2022 at 7:31 pm
Your kisses are my hallelujah and I transcend has got to be my favorite line in the poem. A really beautiful piece
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:45 pm
I’m glad you love it.
Happy
February 12, 2022 at 7:35 pm
People most especially Nigerians have not yet gotten the understanding that not everyone is going to be stinky rich or rich in general. No matter how hard a person tries, it jus might not be his destiny. Why not settle on being comfortable and contented. A really beautiful piece, I wish a lot more people could read it.
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:39 pm
True. We are often so obsessed by the idea of materialism that anything else feels lacking. Thank you for reading.
MudEEE
February 12, 2022 at 8:06 pm
Inspired me
Victory Okoyomoh
February 12, 2022 at 8:38 pm
I’m glad it did. Thank you for reading.
Niel
February 12, 2022 at 10:50 pm
Inspiring ??
Paula
February 12, 2022 at 11:07 pm
This is nice ?
Grace
February 21, 2022 at 9:10 am
This was really inspiring, thanks for sharing
Victory Okoyomoh
February 22, 2022 at 9:02 am
It means a lot that you read through ?
precious
February 22, 2022 at 11:26 am
thank you.
precious
February 22, 2022 at 11:42 am
❤
Mercy Omoruyi
February 25, 2022 at 9:43 am
Amazing. Cheers to being open to love even with the possibilities of being served.
Victory Okoyomoh
February 25, 2022 at 10:00 am
cheers ?
Truth
February 26, 2022 at 11:56 pm
Its all cruise but subconsciously we internalize the fear?
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:50 pm
without even realising it.
Victory
February 25, 2022 at 10:31 am
“We should always be ready to accept the level of vulnerability that comes with genuine love”??
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:45 pm
yes indeed.
Eseme favour
March 4, 2022 at 11:13 pm
Amazing ?
Victory Okoyomoh
March 10, 2022 at 7:31 am
thanks man
precious
February 25, 2022 at 6:47 pm
cool. ❤
Maaruf
February 25, 2022 at 10:27 pm
?
“Love will always imply some level of
vulnerability. “
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:45 pm
scary, isn’t it?
Lulu
February 25, 2022 at 11:28 pm
Cool ??
Brobbey
February 26, 2022 at 6:12 pm
❤️
Niya
February 26, 2022 at 6:20 pm
The first paragraph ? the second, the third, I definitely needed to read this, cos I’ve been inside for too long because I’m trying to avoid accidents ❤️
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:48 pm
I’m glad you read. I hope you find the courage to go outside soon ?
Rakiat
February 26, 2022 at 7:50 pm
More ink to your pen! Irrespective of the breakfast being served, cheers to being open to love and be loved.
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:48 pm
thank you so much. cheers!
Sophia Nazz
February 26, 2022 at 9:12 pm
This is really beautiful
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:49 pm
I’m happy you think so
Esther Okunowo
February 27, 2022 at 10:50 am
Right on point. Great work! ?
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:50 pm
thank you
Omotola
February 27, 2022 at 12:33 pm
Nice Nice
Victory Okoyomoh
February 27, 2022 at 4:44 pm
thank you ?
Francesca
February 28, 2022 at 8:43 am
This is a very thoughtful write up.
We use cruise to mask up important things… I have people say it’s the best survival skill one can have in this country. But we are then oblivious to the fact that our subconscious self is taking in some really harmful contents.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 3, 2022 at 7:14 am
True. We give up genuine human experiences just to survive. It’s an awful trade.
Habib Danesi
February 28, 2022 at 12:22 pm
This is brilliant. Lol.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 3, 2022 at 7:14 am
Thank you!
Sunshine
March 4, 2022 at 6:23 pm
Lol.
This. Gives. Me. So. Much. Peace.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 10, 2022 at 7:28 am
thank you for reading
Sunshine
March 4, 2022 at 6:24 pm
I can relate to every line and it’s soothing to know — see — that I’m not alone. Lol.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 10, 2022 at 7:28 am
It means a lot that you can relate to it
Omowunmi
March 4, 2022 at 6:25 pm
This is beautiful!
Victory Okoyomoh
March 10, 2022 at 7:28 am
thank you! ?
Verena
March 4, 2022 at 6:38 pm
I really needed to read this today. Thank you Victory❤️
Victory Okoyomoh
March 10, 2022 at 7:31 am
I’m happy I shared ?
Lakez
March 11, 2022 at 6:45 am
Very poignant line, access is different from connections. Social media is creating this bias where we think we can be friends with a lot of people just because we happen to have online times that overlap, there is no bigger lie than this. Friendship is much deeper.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:02 am
Indeed! We end up reducing the quality of the friendships we have because we want to have so many.
Kimella
March 11, 2022 at 9:16 am
“You cannot be friends with everyone you know.” Very correct. Social media can give us access to so many people, but it doesn’t guarantee deep connections.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:51 pm
Indeed ?
We mustn’t confuse access with depth
Eseosa Abiodun
March 11, 2022 at 6:05 pm
Exactly! Apparently, nothing lasts forever!
And this applies to everything.
Including Friendship!
We all have to understand and live with that.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:51 pm
I hope we all learn to live with that reality ?
Emmanuella James
March 11, 2022 at 6:06 pm
Love this piece very much
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:52 pm
Thank you ?
Victor Powei Subor
March 21, 2022 at 7:22 am
This was so worth reading. I liked the fact that you spelt out the realities on the topic and also picked out what to focus on, and not holding too tightly and having rigid expectations.
Thank you for writing this, Victory.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 21, 2022 at 7:39 pm
I’m glad you found it worth reading. Thank you for checking it out.
Hamy
March 11, 2022 at 6:18 pm
‘More important is making the most of the time you have with anyone’…. Noiceee
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:51 pm
Thank you for reading ?
Eseosa
March 11, 2022 at 6:19 pm
We all make changes at one point in our lives and I think it affects the friends we have, some friendships make it past the changes, some don’t. That doesn’t make any less valuable.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:53 pm
You surmised it perfectly ?
M.jay
March 11, 2022 at 6:41 pm
This piece is lite
Nice one Vic
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:53 pm
Thank you!
Michael Ayomide
March 11, 2022 at 6:58 pm
This is profound!
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:53 pm
Thanks man! ?
Bilqis Olatinwo
March 11, 2022 at 7:46 pm
So relateable and realistic.Nice piece
Victory Okoyomoh
March 11, 2022 at 7:54 pm
Thank you for reading ?
Osose
March 12, 2022 at 7:04 am
Wow! This speaks so much truth. Great job Victory!
Victory Okoyomoh
March 12, 2022 at 7:31 am
Thank you!
Isaac Idehen Ugiagbe
March 12, 2022 at 7:43 am
I’ve lost friends. People I thought would be there for a long time, or at least till now, but then, life happens. Only validating this article….not all friendships or relationships in general are meant to last forever.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 12, 2022 at 6:55 pm
The beauty of it is, we ultimately will find those who will stay. It always turns out okay ?
Adiel
March 12, 2022 at 7:59 am
Sam Smith once said “…. real love is never a waste of time” . I comfort myself with these words every time a friendship ends. Although I may miss them, but the times we were happy together were never a waste, and so
It is okay.
Thank you for this piece Doctor Wrights?
Victory Okoyomoh
March 12, 2022 at 6:56 pm
Thank you for reading, and sharing these beautiful words ?
Faith
March 12, 2022 at 8:54 am
“You cannot be friends with everyone you know”…
It’s okay to have classmates remain as classmates and the likes..
Wonderful piece.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 12, 2022 at 6:56 pm
Exactly. Everyone should play the roles they are meant to. Thank you for reading ?
Verena
March 18, 2022 at 7:17 am
I love this so much, Victory. I’ve been trying to put together this dark love poem for a while but never got the strength. This sort of inspired me to finish it?. This is a truly lovely poem❤️❤️
Victory Okoyomoh
March 18, 2022 at 6:42 pm
Thank you so much Verena ?
I’d love to read that piece when it’s finished ?
Victoria
March 18, 2022 at 10:55 am
But let me try my Love???
Victory Okoyomoh
March 18, 2022 at 6:43 pm
I’m glad you felt it ?
Onaolapo Michael
March 18, 2022 at 10:04 pm
There’s no science for this kind of love, but I think I want to try it too. ??
Victory Okoyomoh
March 21, 2022 at 5:34 am
I hope we all find love ?
Grace
March 19, 2022 at 2:14 am
Let my body be your coffin and your final resting place.
There is no science for loving you, but let me try, my love.
??
Victory Okoyomoh
March 21, 2022 at 5:34 am
thank you for reading ?
Kendris
March 25, 2022 at 3:21 pm
-Validation would always remain a yardstick for assessment of our actions.
–“Just do it, and don’t mind what anyone says or thinks” but then??
-Be open to criticism and don’t be deterred about people’s negative comments but rather consider it as ornamental
Victory Okoyomoh
March 26, 2022 at 6:21 pm
Thank you for reading and sharing ?
Victor Powei
March 26, 2022 at 6:32 pm
Worth reading as always. Thank you for this piece Victory.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 26, 2022 at 8:42 pm
Thank you for checking it out ?
Damilare
March 26, 2022 at 7:01 pm
Hmmm this was a good read, but here’s my take on Validation. I believe one of the major needs of every human being is the need for “Acceptance” (in your case you called it validation). I agree with the ideology that days humans needs some kind of validation it helps the man stay alive. But I didn’t find the perfect balance for this article. Firstly it’s because I believe Acceptance is a psychological need, while validation in my understanding is not essential. I think if you replaced Acceptance with validation, we’d be on the same page. For instance Feedback from people on this article is not a matter of “Acceptance”, if we don’t like this it won’t affect your social life but perhaps affect productivity positively or negatively. Nevertheless, it was well written and I understand your communications.
With love
Dami
Victory Okoyomoh
March 26, 2022 at 8:39 pm
Thank you Dami, your insight is well appreciated. I do see the line you draw between acceptance as a psychological need and inessential validation.
My employment of the term “validation” instead of “acceptance” is because it’s the more familiar term in this context and my usage of it actually intentionally quite loose.
However, you did also point out that the presence or absence of validation in the way you’ve highlighted it does have some sort of impact. While it may not be an established psychological need, its effects on productivity, as you pointed out, still matter.
I’m grateful for your input, it got my brain churning ??
Obehi
March 27, 2022 at 7:37 am
Great food for thought…..especially for someone who’s made a resolution to stop seeking validation.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 27, 2022 at 5:44 pm
Haha, there’s no need to throw it all out the window. Some of it might be helpful ?
Obehi
March 31, 2022 at 10:09 am
Yeah…..hence the great “food for thought”.
Daniel Ereyi-Usoh
March 27, 2022 at 12:55 pm
Very insightful read I must say. In as much as validation is not necessarily a bad thing, I think we should strive to not make it the basis to scale all our actions.
Victory Okoyomoh
March 27, 2022 at 5:43 pm
You get it. As with everything, moderation is key.
Oghenekevwe
April 14, 2022 at 10:32 am
This is an amazing poem man!!!!!!!
Victory Okoyomoh
April 15, 2022 at 2:00 pm
thank you!
Joy
April 15, 2022 at 3:05 pm
Definitely enjoyed reading this… It’s the last sentence for me
Victory Okoyomoh
April 15, 2022 at 3:39 pm
Thank you for reading ?
Lakez
April 15, 2022 at 3:38 pm
I will like to upset the apple cart. “There is no perfect love, just imperfect people who are on the mend.”
You don’t have a soulmate, really sha. ???
Victory Okoyomoh
April 15, 2022 at 5:23 pm
Wordddd ?
Thank you!
Mo.T
April 15, 2022 at 4:04 pm
Why does everyone assume people who are looking for soul mates are looking for some perfect person? What if it’s not about the perfect factor? What if it’s something else?
You meet like 50 guys, and somehow, they all end up boring you, and, now, you’re looking for…..more. From personal experience, sometimes, all they’re looking for is…..more.
Not everyone is naive as to be waiting, or looking, for a perfect person anymore. Sometimes, we just want more, dammit.
Sorry.
Victory Okoyomoh
April 15, 2022 at 5:22 pm
Hi! There’s no need to apologise for your perspective. It’s valid and I welcome it, so thank you ?
The concept of a soul mate does imply either a perfect person, or a perfect bond. Something ethereal that doesn’t require work. At least, that’s how I perceive it.
My perspective isn’t meant to invalidate yours, but I also didn’t mean to imply settling with just “anyone”. That it’s possible doesn’t necessarily mean that you should, it just requires new perspective.
I suppose I should’ve stated it but I assumed it went without saying and that’s my bad ?. I did highlight the importance of finding someone whose values align with yours.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting more, I’m just pointing out the reality that “more” may look different from what you imagine.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me ?
Adiel
April 22, 2022 at 10:03 am
For the first paragraph I imagine a goth who wears too much eye makeup. He’s sniffling softly because of his allergies.
He can’t even look her in the eyes as he hands her a withered rose…..
And for some reason I put The Weekend’s Out of Time as the song for it?
I love how delicate this feels yet there’s so much emotion.
Once again thank you Doctor Wrights ?
Victory Okoyomoh
April 22, 2022 at 11:35 am
I like the picture you paint. It adds depth to the lines I’ve written.
Thank you too ?
Mojisola
April 22, 2022 at 10:30 am
Very beautiful.
Victory Okoyomoh
April 22, 2022 at 11:34 am
Thank you ?
Zimoni
April 29, 2022 at 2:09 pm
Hi Victory. I quickly came to check this out because The Perks of Being a Wallflower is one of the books I started out with when I newly fell in love with literature. It is a warm book. And as you said, a sad kind of warm but warm none the less. And warmth is what our hearts need. I remember crying at my thoughts of what might happen to one of the characters. Lol. I just want to say I’m grateful for books and how they open us to ourselves.
Victory Okoyomoh
April 29, 2022 at 6:47 pm
I’m grateful for books too, and persons like you who read them. Thank you for sharing ?
Adiel
April 29, 2022 at 4:46 pm
Somehow I think your writing has made me find my safe space. It’s like every single thing I ever felt and thought, is finally coming out and I can tell myself I’m just a human person too and all these things, they’re real, and I’m not weak to feel them and be exactly who I am.
As always
Thank you Doctor Wrights ?
Victory Okoyomoh
April 29, 2022 at 6:54 pm
I’m glad you read my writings and feel this way about them. I feel this way about the writers I read often and I can definitely relate, so thank you too ?
Alezamdrea
April 30, 2022 at 10:29 am
Thank you for this, Victory!
Victory Okoyomoh
May 3, 2022 at 9:28 am
Thank you too ?
Richmond Esosa
May 7, 2022 at 10:04 pm
Beautiful piece! Pray for comfort for you Bro?
Victory Okoyomoh
May 7, 2022 at 10:12 pm
Amen. Thank you ?
May
May 13, 2022 at 7:33 pm
Needed to read this today. Thank you, Victory.
Victory Okoyomoh
May 13, 2022 at 7:49 pm
I’m happy to share. Thanks for checking it out ?
Ethereal
May 13, 2022 at 7:39 pm
❤️
Victory Okoyomoh
May 13, 2022 at 7:49 pm
?
Chantelle
May 13, 2022 at 8:27 pm
I actually needed this…thank you❤
Victory Okoyomoh
May 14, 2022 at 6:09 am
thank you for reading ??
Otis
May 13, 2022 at 9:45 pm
♥
Victory Okoyomoh
May 14, 2022 at 6:10 am
?
Bilqis
May 13, 2022 at 11:50 pm
Very nice read. And a beautiful reminder too
Victory Okoyomoh
May 14, 2022 at 6:12 am
thank you ?
Damilare
May 14, 2022 at 9:58 am
Good one victory ✌️.
For whoever is struggling with Time Management. You can get ‘No Excuses’ by Brian Tracy or ‘Eat That frog now!’ By the same author.
Time is one of your greatest treasures don’t let Instagram and tiktok steal it.
Victory Okoyomoh
May 16, 2022 at 5:36 pm
Great recommendation. Thanks man ?
Thalia.
May 15, 2022 at 7:01 pm
Love it!
Victory Okoyomoh
May 16, 2022 at 5:36 pm
Thank you ??
Cirphrank
May 15, 2022 at 10:59 pm
Keyword: accountability.
make “gen Z” dey read and learn abeg.
Victory Okoyomoh
May 16, 2022 at 5:37 pm
?? we have to.
Mojisola
May 27, 2022 at 7:52 pm
This is one hundred percent real. Cancel Cancel Culture!
Victory Okoyomoh
May 27, 2022 at 9:06 pm
Yesss ?
Nathatcher
May 27, 2022 at 8:28 pm
Nice work ☺️
Victory Okoyomoh
May 27, 2022 at 9:07 pm
Thank you ?
Ayo
May 27, 2022 at 8:57 pm
This was a delight to read. Well done Victory I genuinely enjoy reading you write.
Victory Okoyomoh
May 27, 2022 at 9:08 pm
Thank you so much man. I’m glad you do ?
Godswill
May 27, 2022 at 9:07 pm
This is very ture and cancel culture can be cancelled but it would still be the same thing repeating itself. Cancel culture would be cancelling their own culture and still shutting people up for having an opinion.
Victory Okoyomoh
May 28, 2022 at 9:04 am
Haha. I hoped someone would point this out. It’s a bit of a loop ?
Obehi
May 27, 2022 at 9:47 pm
Haven’t read truer words in a while. Cancel culture also breeds hypocrisy and kills originality.
Ebuwa Ohenhen
May 27, 2022 at 11:20 pm
I agree.
Victory Okoyomoh
May 28, 2022 at 9:03 am
Kills originality ?
Herd mentality isn’t ever the best.
Thank you ?
Uwa
May 27, 2022 at 10:54 pm
This is so enlightening and a good read
Victory Okoyomoh
May 28, 2022 at 9:04 am
Thanks a lot ?
Etin-osa
May 28, 2022 at 12:05 am
Great piece.
Victory Okoyomoh
May 28, 2022 at 9:04 am
Thank you ??
Aro kehinde
May 31, 2022 at 7:34 am
This is lovely and I really enjoy every bit of it.
Victory Okoyomoh
June 4, 2022 at 9:48 pm
That means a lot. Thank you ?
Rashyd
May 31, 2022 at 9:57 am
Nice work bro
I like how you choose to start up conversations we mostly shy away from… And you do it so eloquently
Victory Okoyomoh
June 4, 2022 at 9:47 pm
Thank you very much. I hope to keep doing that ?
Derhmee
June 11, 2022 at 8:54 pm
Victory, you write so eloquently that every line creates a picture and as I read through they are set in motion, one which didn’t stop even at the end of the last line.
Victory Okoyomoh
June 13, 2022 at 8:58 pm
Thank you so much ?
Ether
June 11, 2022 at 8:54 pm
This feels like it was written for me, I didn’t realize that I was an anxious lover until I read it ?
Victory Okoyomoh
June 13, 2022 at 8:58 pm
I’m glad you found that insight ??
Victoria
June 11, 2022 at 10:12 pm
????
Victory Okoyomoh
June 13, 2022 at 8:59 pm
☺️?
Isaac Idehen Ugiagbe
June 13, 2022 at 10:14 pm
“I keep looking for you in every person I meet”
Why can I relate to this so much ??
Ifeoluwa
June 14, 2022 at 2:29 pm
Thanks for this great piece Victory
Victory Okoyomoh
July 8, 2022 at 9:05 am
Thank you for checking it out ?
Adroit
July 8, 2022 at 9:15 am
This is beautiful bro.It’s worth a second read and more..
Victory Okoyomoh
July 8, 2022 at 2:35 pm
Thanks a lot man ??
Ayomide Michael
July 8, 2022 at 3:47 pm
Ah I was wondering why I haven’t seen your post in a while. Funny how I deeply get you. Just yesterday my girlfriend was asking why I have become so edgy and less caring and it stuck me that it’s because everything I have come to love I have sold out to make money from and now I no longer love anything. Everything is just work and all that shit. Lol. I have too much on my desk and too little in my account. It’s supposed to be a sacrifice yeah? This youth i mean. We are supposed to sacrifice our youth for a better tomorrow or so. But Omoo.
Victory Okoyomoh
July 10, 2022 at 10:23 am
It’s crazy man. Combining everything is never as easy as it seems.
I hope we find peace in the chaos ?
Pingback
Okoro Victoria
July 15, 2022 at 6:22 pm
Happy birthday in advance dear.
Victory Okoyomoh
July 15, 2022 at 6:37 pm
thank you!
Hedwig
July 15, 2022 at 6:24 pm
Love it!
keep it up!
Victory Okoyomoh
July 15, 2022 at 6:37 pm
thank you very much ?
Zimoni
July 15, 2022 at 6:41 pm
Hey vee, I’m smiling while writing this comment. We have a lot ahead of us. It’s easy to be overwhelmed by the magnitude of responsibilities ahead but if we only focus only on those we make our existence centered just on bleak necessities. We would not be fair to ourselves that way. So let us take out time to listen to the echoes of the mountains, express every emotion as they come, watch the sky turn blue to grey to yellow and everything beautiful. Life is beautiful. Take your time and live it. Happy Birthday to you ???
Victory Okoyomoh
July 16, 2022 at 4:23 am
“If we only focus on the magnitude of the responsibilities ahead, we make our existence centred just on bleak necessities and we would not be fair to ourselves that way”
Such true words that I’m going to try to remind myself of often. Life is truly beautiful. Thank you ?
Nora
July 15, 2022 at 8:34 pm
Comment*
I have battled with birthday depression for a long time now and I thought it was just something only I felt. Days to my birthdays I am filled with trepidation and gloom and I can’t seem to come out from the depression.
I turned a new year this July and it was worse than ever. It provoked me to write something about it. I just wish I could be as happy as everyone else and simply enjoy the beauty of my birthdays
Victory Okoyomoh
July 16, 2022 at 4:26 am
Hey Nora, I’m sorry you’ve had to struggle with this. I have too and it’s honestly no delight. You deserve an amazing birthday celebration and I hope you’re able to find the strength to enjoy the next one.
There’s a lot to be thankful for. I hope you’re able to see this truly ?
Bilqis
July 15, 2022 at 8:46 pm
Happy birthday in advance Victory.
This post is very relatable and i always try to make those who experience same feel better , but i hardly do for myself. Thanks for this beautiful post. I hope you feel happier and happier for this and many more birthdays.
Victory Okoyomoh
July 16, 2022 at 4:27 am
Thank you!
I’m jealous that you hardly ever experience it and I’m happy for you too. Birthdays should be delightful and I’m glad you have that ?
osamu
July 15, 2022 at 9:43 pm
Happy birthday in two days, Victory.
Victory Okoyomoh
July 16, 2022 at 4:21 am
Thank you chief ?
Deborah
July 15, 2022 at 10:25 pm
Happy Birthday in advance, Victory.?❤️
Victory Okoyomoh
July 16, 2022 at 4:27 am
Thank you ???
Mojisola
July 16, 2022 at 6:39 am
This is a very lovely post? I have the birthday depression almost every year too, my birthdays have just always been a reminder of the things I haven’t done, you know? The recent one though, in May, when I turned 22, i wouldn’t say it wasn’t depressing, cause it kind of was; all my friends weren’t around, and I spent it alone, but the step-up that I think it had over other birthdays, was the fact that I didn’t dwell in the depression. I made sure to keep pushing it to the back of my mind, not giving it any light of day, to fester. But, in that sense, and reading this post now, I see that it is not exactly a full progress, because I didn’t deal with it, that is, I didn’t think about the good things, I just pushed the bad things to the back of my mind. Which, if I’m being really honest, is really not all that better either. But what your blog post have done for me, is, one, helps me see that i am not alone in this (the comments :)), and, two, I am going to try to be better about my birthday next year.
(I’m really sorry I’ve turned your comment section to a mini blog post, lol?, this topic just really speaks to me, and a lot of others, apparently)
Thank you for this❤
Oh, and happy birthday in advance.
Victory Okoyomoh
July 16, 2022 at 7:01 am
I’m glad I shared this. Honestly, comments like yours make me feel like I’m not alone too. I like to remind myself that it’s a work in progress. Maybe your last birthday wasn’t awesome, but the next one could be and it’s up to you.
I don’t mind you turning the comments section into a mini blog post, I’m just happy to hear your thoughts?
Thank you for reading, and thank you for the birthday wish ?
Rozmarie
July 16, 2022 at 11:07 am
❤❤❤❤
Victory Okoyomoh
July 16, 2022 at 12:40 pm
??
Emmykingz
July 16, 2022 at 7:25 pm
Beautiful. I feel it every time, good to know I’m not alone haha. I occasionally get me gifts and go somewhere different to help me feel better but I almost always work all day on my birthdays to keep me distracted (as usual).
Thanks for sharing as mine is few months away and I can’t predict how I’d feel by then. I’ll keep my fingers crossed this time?
Victory Okoyomoh
July 17, 2022 at 7:17 pm
I’ll keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best for you man. Thank you for reading ?
Xoxo
July 16, 2022 at 7:27 pm
This is sooooooo relatable.. I hope you’re happy tomorrow, but even if you aren’t, I hope you know that I’m rooting for you ?
Victory Okoyomoh
July 17, 2022 at 7:17 pm
Thank you ?
PS: I was happy today
Dorcas
July 16, 2022 at 8:45 pm
I actually smiled when you said your birthday gift would be not giving in to birthday depression.
I love how raw this is. I thought I was the only one that feels this way. My birthday is also this month and I’ve been masking the birthday depression with superficial happiness.
I’d try not to give in to birthday depression this year?
Thanks for sharing this.
Victory Okoyomoh
July 17, 2022 at 7:18 pm
I’m rooting for you. Us July babies deserve happy birthdays. I hope yours is delightful ?
Chantelle
July 16, 2022 at 10:09 pm
I hope you have a splendid day tomorrow ?Happy birthday dear?
Victory Okoyomoh
July 17, 2022 at 7:18 pm
Thank you so much ?
Omah
July 17, 2022 at 12:55 am
This year’s birthday was the only one I was genuinely excited about before it even came for the past 3 years.
I thought I was the only one who experienced this. I find solace in knowing I’m not alone.
I think what happened differently this year was that I finally came to terms with the fact that growth is not as terrible as I thought it was. A new season should be exciting and the fact that I get a shot at another year to stretch onto greater things? Amazing..
Happy birthday in arrears Victory?
Victory Okoyomoh
July 17, 2022 at 7:22 pm
I love all you said. Growth isn’t as terrible as it seems ?
Thank you for sharing
Ifeoluwa
July 17, 2022 at 11:26 am
Happy birthday Victory ???
Thanks a lot for talking about this.
Victory Okoyomoh
July 17, 2022 at 7:23 pm
Thanks a lot ?
Ibrahim
July 19, 2022 at 4:51 am
Belated birthday victory!
Victory Okoyomoh
August 17, 2022 at 7:29 pm
thank you!
Pingback
Juno
August 18, 2022 at 1:20 am
Great read, as always ??
And, justice for the non-lovers of plantain ?. This open discrimination will not be condoned. You’ll hear from our lawyers soon ?
Victory Okoyomoh
August 18, 2022 at 1:39 am
Thank you ?
I’ll only be hearing from your lawyers if they like plantain too ???
Jennyfa
August 19, 2022 at 12:02 pm
I just came across this piece and fell in love with it.❤
I might pardon you for not liking fried plantain…but when you don’t take onions?that’s a no no!
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 6:28 pm
Thank you for reading ?
Some things are unforgivable??
Ede
August 19, 2022 at 6:34 pm
Awesome ?
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 6:44 pm
thank you ?
Femi Ore-Ewi
August 19, 2022 at 6:44 pm
Nice post. My first contact with the word TALKING STAGE
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 6:54 pm
Thank you for reading.
It’s really your first contact? It was almost all I heard about for a while. I hope this was a good enough introduction at least.
Mojisola
August 19, 2022 at 6:45 pm
I know I’ll probably be cancelled for this ? but what the h*** is all the fuss about dodo? I’m sorry (not sorry), but I just don’t see it.
Barring that, this is a really great post, and as always, you touch on the really important stuff with grace and open-mindedness, which is what we all need from random blog posts like these❤
So, yeah, talking stages don’t necessarily ‘fail’, the person’s just not my (your) person ?
(Lemme comman run away before the dodo lovers that are already gathering in the comment section come and attack me?)
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 6:52 pm
??? Dodo is goated, please. Premium stuff.
Thank you for reading, it means a lot. And I’m glad you see my side too. They are just not my (your) person and that is okay.
Oghogho
August 19, 2022 at 6:45 pm
Interesting read. Nice perspective.
But what’s up with this obsession for fried plantain? ?
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 6:53 pm
Thank you for reading ?
What’s not to obsess about? ?
Uwa
August 19, 2022 at 7:17 pm
Haven’t had much talking stage this year but I’m happy to know that they are no failed talking stages.this was a great read
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 8:40 pm
Thank you for reading ?
Yes. Every talking stage accomplishes something. In that way, they don’t really fail.
Michael Kojo Onaolapo
August 19, 2022 at 7:17 pm
Nice read, again, Victor.
Reading your post is always like a confirmation of my thoughts.
Thanks for always sharing your thoughts.
And yeah, dodo is goated!?Even though i don’t take it much.
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 8:47 pm
Thank you for reading ?
You should take more dodo ?
Nosa Osarenren
August 19, 2022 at 7:30 pm
I love how your writing are so easy to read. I tell myself I’m too busy to read all these words at the moment but then I read the first line and boom! I am at the last paragraph. The wright magic ✨??
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 8:47 pm
Thank you so much. I’m grateful for your time and attention ??
Chantelle
August 19, 2022 at 7:32 pm
Nice one Vee?
I think I’d just make a Questionaire next time?…No.1 question: Do you like fried plantain? ??
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 8:42 pm
?? that’s one hell of an idea
Thank you ?
Musa Tariq
August 19, 2022 at 7:53 pm
Has my name written all over it ?,, took it this very personal,, great work Vee
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 8:48 pm
?? hopefully you find love soon
Thank you ?
Etin-osa
August 19, 2022 at 8:26 pm
Nice piece Chief.
Victory Okoyomoh
August 19, 2022 at 8:43 pm
Thanks boss ??
Musa Daniel
August 19, 2022 at 9:51 pm
My favorite line has too be “imagine if they don’t like fried plantain” ? ? ?
But I feel the reason for the context of “failed talking stage” is because we put in too much pressure and expectation into a rush of emotion and then beat ourselves up for not meeting that satisfaction in the long run.
Anyways though, na una get power to find who to do talking stage with, I just want to make money, graduate and japa to continue my life goals
Victory Okoyomoh
August 20, 2022 at 8:23 am
Your second paragraph ?
I hope you accomplish your life goals ?. Thank you for reading.
Chiamaka Amaechi
August 20, 2022 at 7:28 am
Yeah, not liking fried plantain is a huge red flag? What an enjoyable read❤️
Victory Okoyomoh
August 20, 2022 at 8:23 am
Thank you! ?
Favour Imoru
August 20, 2022 at 8:38 am
Came across this post and decided to read through…. You’re a brilliant writer.
I resonate with the idea of there not being failed talking stages, it wasn’t just meant to work out.
But why will someone not like fried plantain? Like, what then do they like?
Victory Okoyomoh
August 20, 2022 at 4:43 pm
Thank you very much. I’m glad my idea resonates with you.
Right? preference for fried plantain is definitely a test of character.
Omejiro
August 22, 2022 at 10:20 am
Amazing Write Up, I Should Go Through The Rest As Well.
For This Talking Stage Thing,
I Think We Should Even Start Working On Making Our pdfs On “All About Me”
I Will Just Send It Then You Read Through, You Too Will Send Your Own, I’ll Read, Let’s Know If We Go Do Or We No Go Do?
If Not That People Too Dey Lie? That’s Operation Zero Emoshuna Stress.
?Now How Can Anyone Not Even Like Dodo…. How? I thought we all want and pray for the good things of life ?
Yet you don’t like Dodo…. issokay
Victory Okoyomoh
August 23, 2022 at 9:04 am
Thank you, please check them out.
?? Reducing emotional stress will definitely be good. I also think talking stages would be easier if we were all more honest.
People that don’t like dodo obviously don’t know good things.
Three❤️
August 26, 2022 at 7:29 pm
This was a very beautiful read ❤️
Victory Okoyomoh
August 27, 2022 at 7:29 am
Thank you ?
Ayomide
August 26, 2022 at 7:41 pm
Ah yes this is the post! You see I have always wanted to write something about this. I had always wanted to define what being a man meant. What being masculine meant and it was until recently I was able to come up with a definition thanks to a book I read by Jordan B Peterson. And I have come to see how it can be easy for society is pin the hide your emotion tag on men and why the tag might have stayed for so long. This was delightful to read Victory! This for writing something this thoughtful!
Victory Okoyomoh
August 27, 2022 at 7:41 am
Thank you for reading ??
It’s an unfortunate cycle that I really hope we break soon ?
Big Name
August 26, 2022 at 7:57 pm
Elite piece
Victory Okoyomoh
August 27, 2022 at 7:41 am
Thank you ??
Femi Ore-Ewi
August 26, 2022 at 8:07 pm
More men need to hear the message
Femi Ore-Ewi
August 26, 2022 at 8:07 pm
Includes the society at large
Victory Okoyomoh
August 27, 2022 at 7:41 am
Indeed. A lot needs to change.
Godswill
August 26, 2022 at 8:23 pm
This is lovely. It’s like what I say to people we’re humans before our gender.
Victory Okoyomoh
August 27, 2022 at 7:42 am
Exactly. Our humanity is more important.
Ibrahim A. Hassan
August 26, 2022 at 8:49 pm
Of course, the emotions we are talking about here are the negative ones that. e.g
anxiety, sadness, depression etc. Like you said, whether or not men show them, they are nonetheless present.
But what I think is the major problem with “Men cry too”, is the consequence of taking the advice. The systemic response men get after showing vulnerabilities are mostly not encouraging sadly; ranging from nonchalance to outright ridicule. Notably, this comes not only from men but also women, and which is sad, because they are those from whom men hope to get a better response, at least being those whom the society has mostly greeted their expressed emotions with empathy since forever .
Mr Wrights, I look forward to a sequel to this article where you explore what men would want as a response to them expressing their vulnerabilities and the current state of our society on this.
Thank you.
Victory Okoyomoh
August 27, 2022 at 7:59 am
Your comment is very insightful, thank you for sharing. I think it’s a valid point you’ve raised about the reaction to these emotions not being quite as empathetic as it should be. Sadly, I think that’s owing to the fact that we still have a long way to go with regards to humanising and accepting men’s emotions. I hope it gets better ?
Precious Cole.
August 28, 2022 at 12:29 pm
Beautiful piece Victory.
Victory Okoyomoh
August 28, 2022 at 10:29 pm
Thank you for reading ?
Mojisola
August 29, 2022 at 6:34 am
Another enlightening read as usual❤
And so very important, oh so very important. The ‘damage’ parts of our culture- its teachings- have done to our society, will only be repaired with time, lots of it, and conscious and deliberate relearning, I’m afraid.
Like this here, it would take deliberate conviction on the part of each individual, to act rightly in response to the Men Cry Too movement, and the practical daily life examples. For women; to not scoff, or sneer at any general show of emotional action by men. And men; to not automatically feel all these things you listed up there- fear, unfamiliarity, and so on.
I can’t even pretend to understand the true depths of this issue, I can only imagine, but I try to respond to it with empathy (the empathy we are acclaimed to have in abundance).
Great work here, Victory, really❤
Obomighie Freedom
August 29, 2022 at 7:44 am
Nice one…very enlightening
Victory Okoyomoh
August 31, 2022 at 12:54 pm
Thank you
Mercy
August 31, 2022 at 8:36 am
Beautiful Piece.
Victory Okoyomoh
August 31, 2022 at 12:54 pm
Thank you for reading
Uwa
September 1, 2022 at 8:44 am
This is a great post
Victory Okoyomoh
September 5, 2022 at 7:14 pm
Thank you!
Bloom Patrick
September 24, 2022 at 2:52 pm
This is lovely!?✨
Victory Okoyomoh
September 26, 2022 at 7:57 pm
Thank you! ?
Osamu
September 29, 2022 at 9:51 am
I read this poem every once in a while, I’m still not sure why. Some days I think it’s because of the title (this is my leading hypothesis), but I also find the second paragraph or stanza compelling. Maybe it’s both, who knows?
This is a fine poem Victory.
Victory Okoyomoh
November 10, 2022 at 10:13 pm
Thank you, Osamu. This poem is a favourite of mine too. I’m glad you like it ?
Osunde victory
October 24, 2022 at 11:06 am
This post should reach every men
A lot of men need to read this
Very enlightening
Victory Okoyomoh
November 10, 2022 at 10:12 pm
Thank you ?
Charles
November 23, 2022 at 6:44 pm
Amazing read. The world should be more aware of this
Victory Okoyomoh
November 25, 2022 at 4:49 pm
Thank you very much
Victoria
December 4, 2022 at 8:25 pm
that bit about forgiving the present self who is somehow unable to let go of the past is so relatable. I at times find myself still mad at myself over mistakes made years before but then I’m learning to let go and just forgive myself in baby steps
Victory Okoyomoh
December 5, 2022 at 3:01 am
Baby steps ?
I’m learning too. I hope we get there soon.
VVV
December 4, 2022 at 8:27 pm
I guess kindness to oneself is literally the hardest but thanks for the reminder, Victory.
Victory Okoyomoh
December 5, 2022 at 3:01 am
It really is the hardest. But it’s so necessary ?
Zimoni
December 4, 2022 at 9:21 pm
I’ve missed you and your, sometimes graceful other times far from graceful, pieces. lol. I enjoyed reading this and it made me feel better.
Victory Okoyomoh
December 5, 2022 at 3:02 am
I’m glad it made you feel better ?
Apologies for not being very consistent lately. A lot has been happening.
Essie
January 7, 2023 at 7:58 am
the part where you said time is only a construct struck a chord in me. i also didn’t feel that my year ended on a final note, but here’s to more favorable conditions for the new year for us all!
Victory Okoyomoh
January 7, 2023 at 10:15 am
I’m glad you could relate. Cheers to a more favourable new year ?
Rubie Patrick
January 7, 2023 at 8:31 am
Jajajajajajajaja
Victory Okoyomoh
January 7, 2023 at 10:14 am
Words to live by ??